


Fuck It, I Love You

by moonlightxx



Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Explicit Sexual Content, Knotting, Multi, Mutual Pining, Self-Lubrication
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-19
Updated: 2017-04-19
Packaged: 2018-10-20 18:42:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10668546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonlightxx/pseuds/moonlightxx
Summary: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics class was fucking useless, where's the the lesson about what to do when you're around the guy you like and can't help but get a little wet because of how hot he is?Or, the one where Clay and Tony are in love and everyone knows but them.





	Fuck It, I Love You

**Author's Note:**

> This fic does not follow the events of the show. English is not my first language so I'm sorry about any mistakes.

Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics class was fucking useless. Where's the the lesson about what to do when you're around the guy you like and can't help but get a little wet because of how hot he is?

Sometimes Clay really hated being an omega. He hated it in the way some guys would look at him, like he was a piece of meat, basically just a body for them to fuck and breed. He hated it when people acted like he was less than alphas, like having a knot made you oh so special. He hated it when people expected his aspirations to be being a househusband and take care of the kids and cook and clean.

Clay hated it the mostly when his body couldn't fucking control itself around Tony Padilla, getting a little wet and releasing pheromones that were supposed to lure him.

Moments like those he was thankful for suppressants and scent blockers. It didn't made him any less wet but at least Tony couldn't smell just how turned on he was when the Latino just as much as looked at his direction. Pathetic really, but there was nothing he could do about his traitor body, he could act as if nothing happened and then rush to the bathroom to wipe it out.

He couldn't even blame himself for such strong reaction though. Tony wasn't your typical alpha, he was still very protective as they usually are and a bit on the demanding side but personality wise he was probably the coolest alpha he knew. Jeff too but he would never let him know that, would go to his head so fast.

He tried to focus on class and not on the alpha sitting just a few chairs ahead. But A/B/O Dynamics class was ridiculous and so outdated. They preached non-stop about abstinence and not enough about contraceptive methods.

Clay himself has been on the pill for two years, since he had his first heat. Not because he had a sexual active life, so far from that, but because it also acted as suppressants meaning he wouldn't go into surprise heats. He could just have gone in regular suppressants and stop with the birth control, but he liked the idea of fooling himself into thinking he would get laid eventually. Kinda like when the Clay in his head was cool and wasn't a ball of anxiety.

By the end of the class everyone was pretty much sleeping or blatantly looking at their phones. Definitely not everyone's favorite class.

“What are you doing after school? Me and Jess are going to Monet's, wanna join us?” Hannah was gathering her things, her long curly hair falling down on her face, Jessica was right behind her, waiting for Clay's answer. Clay was tempted to say yes, but the idea of having to stand Jess and Hannah flirt non-stop in front of him made him change his mind.

“No, you guys can go. I'm good. I have homework to do,” Jess threw him a grateful look, from what he could see she was going to make her move very soon.

Jessica and Hannah have been flirting since they both moved and were assigned to pretty much be friends. They hit off and Clay knew soon they would start dating. He was happy for them, Hannah was a good friend and she deserved to be happy and if he had to stand be the third wheel in the future, he would do it gladly if meant his friend was happy.

He gathered his things as well, kind of grateful that was Friday. The couple of days away from Tony would do him some well. Clay was pretty sure whatever he was feeling was getting stronger and worse with time. Truthfully he knew what it was, but he was too scared to even think of the L word.

Tony and him were friends for a long time, Tony never treated him with anything else than respect, never acting like the fact Clay was an omega gave him a right to act superior which would happen often enough with any other alphas on that school. Clay was scared of ruining their friendship, even more because he was sure Tony was seeing this guy named Brad. Even if wasn't official would eventually be and he didn't want to try get in the way or make Tony be in a uncomfortable situation.

It all also could be resumed in the fact that Clay was afraid of the rejection and the fact he didn't had a lot of friends and he definitely didn't want to lose Tony when they've been friends for so long.

It was a difficult feeling to handle, in one hand he was so infatuated it was a bit sad, and in other you had a friendship of a decade that shouldn't go to waste just because Clay's stupid mind and heart decided Tony was the one to be pining after.

Clay exited the school, ignoring some dirty comment made by one of the jocks, the way home wasn't that long but enough to think things through.

Jeff has been very adamant on the fact he should confess. It sounded like he was pressuring Clay but he knew Jeff was just looking after him on his own way. Maybe that was just his way to show how grateful he was for Clay for tutoring him, his grades got a lot better since their study sessions began. Jeff wanted to pay back by helping him with his social skills, when this one failed, mostly due to Clay's social anxiety, he shifted to helping Clay's love life.

Jeff has been trying to convince him to go to the party on his house that he was planning on having when his parents left town in the next weekend. Clay had said no every time but Jeff was persistent and Clay was close of giving in.

Clay closed his eyes momentarily, enjoying the warmth, it was one of those wonderful days that just were not too hot but also not too cold. He opened it almost as soon as he closed if, he had had too much bike accidents in his lifetime, didn't needed to add one just because he was being purposely careless.

Clay arrived his house soon, it was empty, both of his parents working. He felt relieved, his mom has been trying to connect with him and while he appreciated it, the fact she was interested in his life, it was also she pushing him and trying to get him to open up when he wasn't ready. The topic 'crush’ had been brought up a lot lately, he knew if he told her he had feelings for Tony she would be happy, so would be his father. They both loved Tony and supported their friendship, he even sometimes thought maybe his dad did want them to date.

Now he could enjoy the hours alone, he did have homework so he didn't lie to Hannah, it was true that was due in a couple of weeks but it was good to just get it out of the way. He could use the free time to do something, probably would be video games or Star Wars marathons.

In a couple of hours he was done with most of his homework, only a assignment left but that could wait. His phone vibrated from where he put it on his bed, it was a text from Hannah.

_“Jess and I are dating! She asked me to be her gf today!!!”_

Clay smiled, _called it_ , he thought. Replying that he was happy for them and wished them the best.

There was a time, right after Hannah moved in that he thought he could develop feelings for her. She was nice and had a beautiful smile, was quirky and so funny and he had the best time with her.

 

It never went past platonic though and then right after he noticed one of the main reasons it never went past those friendship feelings was because he had feelings for Tony. Hannah knew and she assured him that Tony felt the same and he was just as oblivious as Clay, both thinking the other didn't reciprocated their feelings but they were in fact reciprocated. Clay thought was bullshit, if Tony had feelings for him he would tell him.

 _You have feelings for Tony and yet didn't tell him, could be the same for him._ His useless brain pointed out, but he ignored it, he didn't want to build expectations. He didn't had any right to expect something from Tony besides what he already gave him.

Clay decided to take a shower and then go downstairs. His dad was cocking, humming a old song Clay sometimes heard him playing before.

Just like Clay, his dad was an omega while his mom was an alpha. Those kind of couples weren't very common, a lot of prejudice involved and coming towards both parts, the male omega and the female alpha. They didn't really care though, especially his dad, never the one to give a damn about what they say about them.

“Hey, dad… How can you tell that someone is into you?” His father looked up, attention drifting from the tomato sauce in front of him.

“That depends. Some people are very subtle, it can be very hard to tell because they are just that good at hiding. Other people are more obvious, the body language usually tells a lot and so does if there's a lot of touching involved of their part, and eye contact.” His father tastes the sauce, looking a bit unhappy and throwing a bit of salt on it.

“What if it all happens because you guys are friends? How can you tell it's because they like you and just not because you're friends with them?” His father stopped what he as doing, fully turning around to look at him, Clay tried not to flinch.

“If you're not sure the right thing to do would be open up to them about how you feel and ask them how they feel in return. If they say they don't felt the same you can just move on and work on forget about them.” It was what Hannah has been insisting for a while and sounded like a good plan on paper but he knew would not go that well if he tried it.

“Yeah… Thanks, dad. I'll keep it in mind.” Clay was ready to leave, thinking he should shower before dinner was ready.

“And Clay… Tony reciprocate your feelings.” Clay was left there, mouth hanging open, looking at his dad's back while he focused his attention back to the sauce, while humming the song again.

 

 

 

By the time next week rolled around, Clay was sure there was some kind of conspiracy to get him to confess to Tony. 

 

The subject somehow kept popping up, and was hard to ignore and believe him, he tried. He could understand why Hannah and Jessica would be so into it, they were in love and in a stage where they wanted everyone to feel like they were feeling, but there was no explanation for Alex, Courtney and even Ryan, Tony's ex boyfriend to just drop the fact that apparently Tony liked him back.

Jeff had convinced him to go to his party, Jessica and Hannah were going too and even if he had to stay around while they were making out, at least he would have them at the party. He also came to the conclusion that the party would be a perfect place to tell Tony about how he felt, it sounded weird, a lot of people around would usually be a deal breaker for people who wanted to confess their feelings, but he could use the fact the place would be crowded to make the perfect exit when the time came.

The week went by very slowly. It probably would have to do with the fact now every time Clay saw even a glimpse of Tony's perfect combed hair he would flee, not ready to face him after all that people have been saying. It wasn't that hard, they only had one class together, the other times they saw each other in school were mostly when they were leaving, Tony liked to give Clay rides home.

 

According to his friends Tony asked around about him. He felt bad, he really did, but if he were to talk to him about feelings he first needed to prepare himself for it and that included avoiding the Latino until he felt like he was prepared for it.

Soon was Saturday, the day of Jeff's party. He woke up later than he usually would, brushing his teeth and showering, wondering what he should wear, if he was going to get rejected by Tony Padilla he figured he should at least looked good while it happened.

Clay opened his closet, staring at his clothes, noticing how they are were so similar and he apparently didn't had anything else that wasn't shades of blue, white and grey. He didn't really care about fashion or anything of the sorts so he wasn't surprised there was nothing there that could be seen as trendy and people were wearing. He wondered if would be just too much to buy new clothes. Clay knew realistically if Tony indeed had or didn't had any feelings for him, the clothes wouldn't make a lot of difference.

He ended up going to the mall anyway, regretting as soon as he stepped into it, remembering how much he hated buying clothes. He entered the first store focused in males’s wear that he found. A good looking omega with a nice smile approached him.

“Hi, can I help you with anything?” Oh well, what the hell, Clay thought, he was already there so he might as well just go with it.

“What would you recommend to someone who is about to tell their friend he has a crush on them and wants to look nice in case he gets lucky and their feelings are reciprocated but also doesn't wanna look bad in case is rejected?” The attendant, Daniella, according to her name tag, looked surprised, recovering quickly.

She showed him a couple of shirts, he ended choosing a baby blue dress shirt that apparently matched his eyes and skin tone. The jeans they picked together was tighter than he would go for. He paid and quickly left.

Night arrived fast, Clay had learned that because it said the party would start at 7pm it didn't actually mean it would start 7pm. When he got there 9pm, the party was going in full swing, it was too early on to tell but so far people seemed to only be dancing and drinking and have a good time in general. Clay had no idea if Hannah and Jessica were already there. Or Tony.

Clay walked into the house, it was really warm inside and he started sweating almost instantly. Jeff appeared, immediately looking happy and satisfied that he was there.

“I'm glad you came.” He said or more like, shouted, the song was so loud the floor beneath Clay's feet was shaking. “Drinks and snacks are on this side.” Jeff pointed somewhere in the back of the house. “And Padilla is on that side” He pointed to his right. Clay's heart started pounding inside his chest as soon as he heard those words.

Clay thanked Jeff, going in the direction he said Tony was, thinking was the best to get this over with while he had built up enough courage. He could feel his anxiety take its toll on his body, the clammy hands, the knots on his belly, he felt slightly dizzy. On his way he saw Jessica and Hannah already making out on the couch, he decided not to interrupt and continued to look for Tony.

In one of the corners of the house he managed to see him, his hair looked a bit short like Tony just got a haircut and he had his signature leather jacket on. When Clay was close enough he noticed the person next to him, it was Brad. Clay's felt his breath hitch, stopping on his tracks, at the same moment Tony looked at his direction, Clay's mind was a blank, Tony started moving towards him and he did the first thing his instincts told him to do: run.

He ran fast, bumping into people along the way, apologizing and trying to push people out of the way at the same time, he was out of the house in no time, the fresh air washed over him, making him sigh, he started walking a bit slowly now, reprimanding himself for being so stupid in believing Tony could for some goddamn reason he didn't even could think why have feelings for him. He felt himself being pulled by his arm and found himself face to face with Tony.

“Why did you run like that? Even better, why have you been running and avoiding me the whole week? Did I do something to hurt you?” Tony sounded genuinely sad and it made Clay angry at himself for avoiding the Latino just because he didn't knew what to do with all that he was feeling, the last thing he wanted was to hurt him in any way.

"No, you didn't. I'm just, argh, I'm sorry it's all on me, just please forget and we can move on.” Clay started moving again but was stopped.

“No. At least not until you tell me what is going on. Something must have happened.”

“Nothing happened!” That sounded so fake to his own ears and definitely sounded to Tony's, why couldn't he just be a better liar?

“Clay, I know you, something has been bothering you, if you tell me I can fix it.”

“The thing is you can't fix it, Tony! Can you fix the fact I'm fucking in love with you?! Can you fix fact when I see you I feel like my heart is about to burst out of my chest with how fast it is beating? Can you fix the fact doesn't matter how hard I try to let it go I just fucking can't and not telling you this made me feel like I'm suffocating and drowning for so long?” Clay's covered his mouth with his hand, a horrifying feeling taking over him, feeling guilty and panicked that he just confessed in such a way. He didn't waited for Tony to react to it, he just ran, harder and faster, not looking back when he heard Tony shouting his name.

He didn't stop running the whole way to his house, the adrenaline pumping in his veins helping him, he didn't stop to rest or to catch a breath; Clay also didn't looked back, afraid he would see Tony's red mustang even though after that outburst he wouldn't be surprised if Tony didn't talked to him again, ever. 

Clay opened the door of his house, fingers shaking to get the key in, his mom's voice came from the living room when he closed the door.

“You're home early. How was the party?” Clay didn't reply, he just ran upstairs, throwing himself on his bed when he was in the safety of his room. He tried to regain his composure but was hard when he kept replaying the whole night over and over again. Thinking how fucking stupid he was to think confessing would be a good idea. Not only Tony was dating Brad but he now most likely ruined their friendship for good.

Clay heard a knock on his door but he ignored it, he didn't wanted to talk, not now, maybe not ever. Yeah, that was a good idea, he should just not talk ever again to avoid saying stupid things, sounded like a perfect plan.

The door of his room opened and he reprimanded himself for not locking it.

“Hey, kid. What happened?” His dad sounded concerned and he knew so was his mom, he felt a bit bad but mostly he was too caught up in feeling embarrassed to care. “Did someone do something with you at the party?” Clay denied with his head. “Okay… do you want to talk about what happened?” Clay really didn't but the words flooded out of his mouth regardless.

“I screwed up big time with Tony. Basically yelled at him about how in love I am. It was so embarrassing, there's a big chance we will have to move out.” His dad smiled fondly, sitting down on the bed close to him.

  
“Come on, that's Tony you're talking about, couldn't have been that bad” Clay glared at him. “Even if it was, I'm sure he won't be upset about it. He is a good kid, he wouldn't make fun of you for your feelings even if he doesn't feel the same.” Clay knew his dad was right but it didn't stop him of still feeling embarrassed and wanting to disappear for a while or even better, have some sort of superpower that could wipe out that memory of Tony's brain.

They stayed silent for a while and then his dad left. Clay stared at the ceiling and then heard his phone ringing. It was Tony. He turned it off, turning around, not even bothering to take his clothes off, except for kicking off his shoes, he should just burn the whole thing.

 

 

 

The next day he woke up early, still feeling awful about what happened but not as bad at least. He went down expecting to find his parents. He found Tony sitting on his couch though, the Latino immediately getting up when he saw Clay.

“What you're doing here?” Clay had to contain himself to not run again, that would just be pathetic.

“I called you a few times and texted and you didn't pick up, then I called your house’s number and your dad picked up. We talked and I explained him a few things and he let me in and went out with your mom.” Clay was betrayed by his own parents, that was outrageous.

“I'm sorry about yesterday. About shouting at you and… Confessing, I know you're with Brad and I have no intention of coming in between your two, I guess all those feelings just built up so much I kind of exploded and I'm so sorry.” Tony looked at him in disbelief.

“With Brad? What? Clay, I’m not dating Brad, we did had something at one point but it's over for a while now and we are just friends, he actually has a crush on a guy in one of my classes and I was trying to set them both up, he was at the party yesterday.”

“Wait, you're not with Brad?” Clay felt hope, maybe he shouldn't but he felt it.

“I'm not. Actually I have feelings for this other guy. Maybe you know him, very cute and nerdy, has watching Star Wars marathons as a hobby.” Tony walked closer to Clay with each word. “I've been crazy about him for years now, kinda of thought my feelings were one-sided until he yelled that he was in love with me yesterday.” Now Tony was just a couple inches away, Clay couldn't help but stare at Tony's beautiful full lips, licking his own just imagining kissing him. “Do you happen to know him?” Clay learned in, erasing the distance between them, softly kissing Tony.

Tony's right hand immediately went to the back of Clay's neck, the other held his hip, bringing him closer until their bodies were flushed together. Tony's lips pressed harder against his, he licked his bottom lip, asking for entrance which Clay happily gave, their tongues met and Clay moaned, feeling himself get a bit wet, knowing that his smell was taking over the living room, he didn't put on his scent blockers perfume. Clay rubbed himself against Tony, wanting more. Tony slowed down the kiss, then joining their foreheads together, catching their breaths.

“Really I've waited it for so long. So long.” Tony kissed his cheek, trailing down until he was kissing his neck, taking in his sweet scent at the same time. “Fuck, you smell incredible.”

“Really?” Clay didn't usually slick much outside his heats but now he could feel himself starting to drip.

“Yeah, can even smell how wet you are right now.” Clay blushed, whimpering over how turned on he was by Tony's words.

“What you're gonna do about it?” He bared his neck to give Tony more access to kiss it but the Latino stopped and looked at him with a serious expression on his face.

“We don't have to do anything right now. I'll gladly wait for how long it takes for you to feel ready for it.”

“In other circumstances I would wait, but it's you and I'm ready, and I waited for too long. I want you.”

They went to Clay's room. Locking the door behind them.

“Are you sure?” Clay nodded. They still had a lot more to talk about, come into terms with their relationship but right now, in that moment he needed to feel Tony, around him, inside of him. He just wanted him and it, a lot.

It was slow and sweet. They started undressing at first, Clay felt embarrassed but it was forgotten when Tony started touch him. His hands trailed down his whole body, mouth following the path. His neck was littered with small kisses, and licks, Tony didn't bit down knowing how sensitive to a bit a omega’s neck was. Every time he kissed Clay's mating spot he would moan loudly and getting even wetter with the prospect of one day Tony biting down and they being mates. His nipples were played with until he was feeling a mix of pain and pleasure. Tony's hands caressed his thighs, pulling them apart. Clay fought the instinct to close them and not let Tony see everything but it was forgotten when one of his fingers rubbing around his hole.

He was so wet the first one went in easily, he moaned, throwing his hips down, trying to get it in deeper. Tony moved his finger around a little, finding his prostate and making Clay let out an embarrassing sound, he started rubbing it constantly. Then taking his finger off and penetrating him with two fingers, scissoring them, Tony's fingers felt different than his own inside of him and really fucking good. He withdraw his fingers and then there were three in, moving and rubbing relentlessly against his prostate, Clay came, shooting on his own stomach and panting, trying to regain his breath.

He watched with narrowed eyes while Tony got a condom and ripped the package, rolling it down his dick, gulping at the size, it was a lot bigger than anything he ever had inside of him while he was masturbating or during his heats. Tony was on top of him again, in between Clay's spread legs, he kissed his mouth.

“You know I love you, right?” Tony's face was full of love and Clay felt overwhelmed, like he would burst with all the different sensations.

“Hope so since you're about to put your dick in me.” Tony laughed, holding his cock against Clay's entrance, penetrating slowly. Clay's hands went to Tony's hair, bringing his face down.

“I love you too.”

They kissed and Tony started moving slowly, with deep thrusts, that made Clay's toes curl with how good it felt. Tony didn't rush at first, Clay felt the drag of Tony's length going in and out of himself, he gasped, not even being able to form a full sentence to say how good it felt. They continued kissing, the squelch sounds filling the room. Tony moved a little faster, then stopping and changing the angle, going deeper that time, Clay cried out with having the head of Tony's cock rub relentless against his prostate, feeling he was about to come but wanting it to last longer, nothing could be done, especially when Tony's hand went to his hard dick, pumping it fast, using his precum to easy up the way.

Clay came with a shout, hands going to Tony's back and scratching it. Tony wasn't that far behind, his movements became erratic and faster, his knot started to expand inside of Clay, he moaned surprised it how full it felt, it became too big for Tony to put in out so he just made rotating moves, he stopped abruptly, he shoved his face on Clay's neck and moaned loudly, coming inside of the condom.

Tony maneuvered them, staying on the bottom while Clay was on top, Tony's dick still inside of him, if A/B/O Dynamics class was right and useful in some way they would stay like that for the next half hour or so.

“I know it's usually this and then followed by the fucking but… Do you wanna be my boyfriend?” Clay laughed breathless, looking at Tony, memorizing his smiling face, the face of the guy he has been in love and he didn't dared to dream would feel the same but he did.

“Sure.” He smiled, kissing Tony. By the time Tony's knot went down they were ready for round two. That was just as good as the first one.

The end.


End file.
